published: Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Change is good
What is it about change that makes us sick to our stomachs? We don't even realize that our nauseous feeling has to do with trying something new. Sometimes that new reality has been forced on us: Death of a family member, divorce, a move, or any number of things. Other times that change comes from within us when we hit bottom or the straw breaks the camel's back.
I don't always understand this but when we institute the change we are better able to accept it. Maybe it is because it is our decision and not being forced on us. We want to be in control and most of our lives everyone else has been the decision maker.
This is why I think FlyLady works for you. No one can force you to sign up for our emails. No one pushed FlyLady down your throat. You made the decision that you wanted to do things differently. You searched for a solution to the CHAOS in your life. The answer you got probably seemed too simple. "Go shine your sink."
We all have to start someplace. This is where I began my journey to peace. I realized that I had been mean to myself every time I tried to "Get Organized". I piled on and pushed myself too hard only to find myself crashing and burning after only a few days. I needed kindness in my life. That kindness had to come from me.
On that Jan. 1 of 1999 I figured out why I had never been able to "keep house". That was the day I made two New Year's resolutions. One was to "Get Organized" and the other was to be kind to myself. I know you wonder how one has anything to do with the other. It is quite simple. I never gave myself the time to establish a habit. In my perfectionism; I wanted the whole house clean in a day. By being kind to myself; I was able to establish simple habits that over time developed into my routines.
I did not pressure myself with those negative words we hear from our past. When those words would come into my mind; I would delete them and say an affirmation in a loving way. I would repeat it many times. I would also write them out on Post-It Notes to remind me that I could do things a new way.
The truth is, everything I had ever done to "Get Organized" had not stuck with me because I was in too big of a hurry. Perfectionism at its worst. It was only when I took my time and did not put pressure on myself that I started to see the power in the kindness.
Who was it who said, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Albert Einstein? If we want to see a different result we are going to have to change our game plan. Change is good. When we accept that and let go of our perfectionism, add a little kindness we will begin to see the change we want.
Our whole lives we have only wanted to feel loved. That loving feeling we get from being kind to ourselves is the catalyst for lasting change in our lives. That is what FLYing is all about. Finally Loving Yourself enough to let go of the perfectionism.
For more help getting rid of your CHAOS, check out her website and join her free mentoring group at www.FlyLady.net or her book, 'Sink Reflections' published by Random House, and her New York Times Best Selling book, 'Body Clutter' published by Simon and Schuster. Copyright 2012 Marla Cilley. Used by permission in this publication.
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